Hot take: my 3 year old monstera finally put out a split leaf and I almost killed it with kindness
Last month I moved my monstera from the east window to the south window because I read more light means more splits, and within 5 days the leaves curled up like tortilla chips. I panicked and watered it twice in one week plus gave it a dose of fertilizer, which of course made it worse, so I stuck it back in the east window and left it alone for 3 weeks. Should I just stop moving my plants around every time I read something new, or is there an actual way to tell when a plant wants more light before it throws a fit?
Man, I gotta be honest, this sounds way more dramatic than it probably is. A monstera that dropped a split leaf after you nearly drowned it in water and food is basically a plant that's telling you it's fine, not one that's on death's door. Leaves curling from a window move is just sun stress, it's not a big deal, they bounce back once you put them somewhere sane. I don't think there's some secret signal a plant gives off before it freaks out either, you just learn by messing up a few times like you did here. Maybe the real lesson is chill out and stop reading plant blogs at 2am, idk, but your monstera clearly survived so you're doing better than you think.