Wait, TWO HUNDRED DOLLARS? For someone to look at a piece of paper and tell you to add more action verbs? That's wild. I gotta know what they actually did for that price, because it better have come with a job offer attached.

My aunt in Butler County swore the new 5G poles going up in 2020 were gonna fry the birds, and she had a whole folder of printouts about it. Never mind that the poles sat there for two years and the birds kept right on landing on them. I read somewhere that conspiracies like that spike when people feel like stuff is happening to them that they didnt get a say in. The water tower, the smart meters, the cell tower, its all the same thing, something changed and nobody asked us first. Painting over it is honestly the most small town fix ever, just cover the scary thing with beige paint and call it handled.