My uncle drove a wreck truck for 40 years and told me the same kind of thing about weight distribution. He swore the old paper charts were better than any computer screen. Now I double check everything even when the screen says it's fine. Old guys just know stuff from actually doing it.

My neighbor taught her cat to stop shredding curtains by rewarding it with tuna spins, and now it just watches TV instead.

Quitting is for quitters" and she said that with a straight face? Man, I'd have choked on my coffee. Two years is like the standard time to even figure out if a place is worth staying at. Your buddy making 40% more with better hours after six months, that's not a quitter, that's a winner. Most loyalty bonuses I've seen are just a pizza party and a pat on the back. Companies dropped the whole "reward loyalty" thing ages ago, they just expect it now.